GW2: Cannons Are The Coolest Thing

Cannons are the coolest. Yes, they are.

I believe I owe all of you a post about the thing I enjoyed most in this update’s Super Adventure Box.

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It’s this.

No lives consumed. No grinding a million baubles. No juggling with a dozen skills and items. No piss-poor annoying knockback. No grousing about how latency makes timed portions harder.

Just the cheerful unadulterated joy of figuring out how to get here and dance.

In case you were not aware, the lobby of the SAB is a lot bigger than it seems on first glance.

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A little judicious exploration will reveal a subterranean space.

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With an extremely odd feature.

A little logical extension brings you to where you’ll find a number of people like to perch.

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And further extension from there brings you into the clouds. With cannons.

It’s funny, they run on the same principle as the flowers and lightning crystals that shoot you from place to place. That is to say, they’re twitchy, sensitive to latency and not altogether that accurate. Which makes reaching certain clouds with the checkpoint flags on them rather a pain.

But somehow, climbing into the barrel of a cannon and being shot into the air as a rolled up ball of heavy armor spiky doom is SO MUCH FUN.

Y’all owe it to yourselves to give it a try too, if you haven’t already.

It makes finding the genie in the game only a pale second coolest thing.

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The Konami Code on the rock is an amusing easter egg.

It leads to an interesting mini-story that grounds the SAB back in the GW2 world. I liked finding the new lab open where none existed before.

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It’s a tiny reminder that it’s actually possible to permanently change the GW2 landscape if so desired.

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In the lab, you get to overhear little conversation snippets that suggest that Moto broke away from this krewe some time ago, before appearing once more with the fully functioning and sophisticated Super Adventure Box, which leaves you to wonder about what happened in the iterim. Did he get any help with this technology, fer instance?

You learn that there was another original Adventure Box, developed in the past, which was a lot less portable than the technology of today. This krewe borrows some of its schematics to use as a recording device for their Somno-Scholar, which is an attempt to induce learning while sleeping.

Again, there are some implications that are not outright said, but fun to speculate on. The technology this krewe is using is still fairly chunky in size, we might compare it to a PC in our world. Moto seems to be running around with the equivalent of a highly sophisticated smartphone, just one portal that leads into an 8-bit virtual reality creation?

Where, too, might the original Adventure Box be located if we extrapolate backwards and compare the size of a mainframe of old to a PC of today?

Well, there IS an abandoned Proxemics Lab that guilds have been running about in today. It’s ostensibly a place where someone was studying intelligence and learning capabilities of Skritt subjects by throwing them in a giant maze.

It’s a stretch and I personally doubt they’re related beyond being very big in size and not at all portable, but who knows.

Also, on following the instructions of the Genie in the Box and in the metagame quest for achievement get, you end up being the scoundrel who does something to their test of the Somno-Scholar device, which leads to a cutscene.

Iamnowhungryandneedawaffle

It ends up scrambling this guy’s brains a little, but again, there are some interesting implications to speculate on further.

Like, why would anyone go through the trouble of making this a cutscene unless there was an important story development in here somewhere?

There’s a faint hint of it being potentially possible to touch the Eternal Alchemy like Scarlet was supposed to have done in the short story posted on Anet’s website. Except he didn’t, thanks to your interference. On someone’s directions. Whoever that someone is. The guy is convinced it’s a prank by Moto, his old rival. Moto claims complete ignorance when you ask him.

And whether there are any lasting side effects or unforeseen neural re-programming from his experience is an open question.

Guess we’ll have to wait and see.

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GW2: SAB World 2 Zone 1 – Quick Reference Guide to Baubles

  • 20 + 20 baubles – SECRET / DIG – Enter room, dig, jump water spouts, collect 1 2

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  • 10 baubles – COLLECT – behind waterfall 2

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – left side waterfall 2

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – right side waterfall 2

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  • 50 baubles – DIG – after checkpoint, before bridge of assassins, drop down right side cliff

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  • 20 baubles – CHEST – past secret bear cave accessed via lower flower at waterfall

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – drop down from chest area 2

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  • 50 baubles – DIG – from chest area, use cliffs to head backward to plant 2 (involves backtracking, YMMV)

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  • 50 baubles – DIG – from chest area, top platforms around to orange frogs 2

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  • 50 + 5 baubles – BOMB/COLLECT/DIG – past piranha bend checkpoint, left and backwards 1 2

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – fall down past hillbillies, up stream and mushrooms (also COLLECT 10 baubles from outside hillbilly maze) 2

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  • 20 baubles – BOMB – by start of logs across rapids, drop and enter hidden room 2

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  • 50 baubles – DIG – after log sequence, burn trees

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Sources:

  1. Dulfy (world 2 achievement guide, digging locations)
  2. Reddit (Gwikki, imgur guide)

Disclaimer:

This is not meant to be a comprehensive coverage guide. Besides not magically knowing every single location, I have chosen on purpose to leave out a few known sites because they involve way too much backtracking for my liking for too little bauble reward.

This is simply a reference for myself to follow as I move in the general direction of straight ahead to the boss, because I have bad memory and I can update my own blog the fastest as I discover/hear about new sites.

But you’re perfectly welcome to share. If the brevity and lone screenshots do not sufficiently guide you, please see sources above for further elaboration.

Unattributed locations were independently discovered by moi.

GW2: SAB World 1 Zone 3 – Quick Reference Guide to Baubles

  • 20 10 baubles – DIG – take a right up the branch and flowers before first checkpoint

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – Inside Queen Bee Dog Maze, first cliff corner on left 1

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  • 50 baubles – DIG – Take a right at Queen Bee, hop the wall 1

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  • 50 baubles – DIG – take top checkpoint, get to log, jump out hole and over 1

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  • 40 baubles – CHEST – last of three chests if you have a key

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – left of this last chest, hop flower to cliff

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Moving on to World 2 Zone 1….

Sources:

  1. Dulfy (world 1 secrets, world 1 dig locations)

Disclaimer:

This is not meant to be a comprehensive coverage guide. Besides not magically knowing every single location, I have chosen on purpose to leave out a few known sites because they involve way too much backtracking for my liking for too little bauble reward.

This is simply a reference for myself to follow as I move in the general direction of straight ahead to the boss, because I have bad memory and I can update my own blog the fastest as I discover/hear about new sites.

But you’re perfectly welcome to share. If the brevity and lone screenshots do not sufficiently guide you, please see sources above for further elaboration.

Unattributed locations were independently discovered by moi.

GW2: SAB World 1 Zone 2 – Quick Reference Guide to Baubles

  • 5 baubles – DIG – at first waterfall 2

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  • 5 baubles – BOMB – next to dig spot 1

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  • 5 baubles – DIG – after dark room, tree stump on left 1

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  • 20 10 baubles – DIG – on slope opposite to tree stump 1

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  • 20 10 baubles – DIG – in front of shop 1

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – behind leaf 1

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – dead end formed by roots near Queen Bee Dog entrance, go forward a bit

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  • 50 baubles – DIG – climb tree at Queen Bee Dog 1

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  • 25 baubles – BOMB – next to shop

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – left of checkpoint

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  • 20 10 baubles – DIG – just before last checkpoint 1

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – use mushrooms to hop up at checkpoint

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  • 20 10 baubles – DIG – more in corner 1

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Moving on to World 1 Zone 3….

Sources:

  1. Dulfy (world 1 secrets, world 1 dig locations)
  2. Reddit (Cloneconstructor’s W1Z2 bauble locations)

2016 Edit: Minor bauble number corrections

Disclaimer:

This is not meant to be a comprehensive coverage guide. Besides not magically knowing every single location, I have chosen on purpose to leave out a few known sites because they involve way too much backtracking for my liking for too little bauble reward.

This is simply a reference for myself to follow as I move in the general direction of straight ahead to the boss, because I have bad memory and I can update my own blog the fastest as I discover/hear about new sites.

But you’re perfectly welcome to share. If the brevity and lone screenshots do not sufficiently guide you, please see sources above for further elaboration.

Unattributed locations were independently discovered by moi.

GW2: SAB World 1 Zone 1 – Quick Reference Guide to Baubles

  • 5 baubles – BOMB – take a left before first checkpoint 1

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  • 20 baubles – BOMB – left of next checkpoint

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – area near chest with two monkeys 1

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  • 20 baubles – DIG – area near chest with two monkeys 1

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  • 20 baubles – CHEST – if key drops along the way

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  • 6 baubles – BOMB – backtrack from checkpoint

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  • 10 baubles – BOMB – take a right at last checkpoint 1

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Moving on to World 1 Zone 2….

Sources:
  1. Dulfy (world 1 secrets, world 1 dig locations)

Disclaimer:
This is not meant to be a comprehensive coverage guide. Besides not magically knowing every single location, I have chosen on purpose to leave out a few known sites because they involve way too much backtracking for my liking for too little bauble reward.

This is simply a reference for myself to follow as I move in the general direction of straight ahead to the boss, because I have bad memory and I can update my own blog the fastest as I discover/hear about new sites.

But you’re perfectly welcome to share. If the brevity and lone screenshots do not sufficiently guide you, please see sources above for further elaboration.

Unattributed locations were independently discovered by moi.